new starts

i did it. i deleted all my prior posts in order to start fresh on this bad mamma jamma. so far this has been my year of changes. it all started back last fall with me joining Weight Watchers. to date, i have lost FIFTY pounds. it is quite astounding, weird to get used to, but a VERY great feeling! i also did some life cleaning over the last 6 months. i decided it was time to purge all of the toxic things in my personal life especially since i was doing so with respect to my body. this included booting about 3-4 bad seeds (read: people) from my life. at first i doubted my decision. but, after a minute of thinking on it, i discovered that this was one of the best choices i had made in a long time. when you finally realize someone is not a good egg in your life, it is best to run like Hell to get away from them - at least it is in my opinion. i won't dwell on these people because i would be wasting precious typing time. after the new year, i began to date someone i met from eHarmony. he was nice enough and i enjoyed some of the times we had together... but, it become blatantly apparent after about a month that he was not the person i needed to be with. so, in the spirit of more changes, i ended it. well, i should say we ended it - and quite amicably i must say. see, the thing is, i am a VERY social gal, and i need someone who can not only respect that, but keep up with that. he just didn't. in fact, i feel i fell victim to false advertisement on his EH profile. he mentioned he was quiet, but didn't say he NEVER talked, nor communicated with the person he dated. yeah, that was another thing - he just didn't communicate with me period. he full out admitted that he would just go along with things so as not to "rock the boat". well, homegirl don't play that! and i was more than honest about how i was feeling. so, we took a couple of days to think on our long conversation about the relationship and guess what? despite him saying that he thought all was pretty much okay, and the only issue he had was that i was not appreciating him *rolling eyes*, he FINALLY agreed that he didn't think it would work out either. imagine that? had i NOT said anything he would have sat back for another 3 months and been status quo with the relationship. again, homegirl don't play that! oh, another minor detail - when you stop wanting to have relations with your significant other, especially so early on in a relationship, that is usually a good indicator that you should NOT be with them anymore. just saying.... so, back to my year of changes, and the present... yeah, so i got back onto EH after that minor road bump, and i gotta say, while it is okay to try the online dating, i think i prefer the face-to-face meeting of men much better. i have spoken to, and met a couple of nice guys... but i just haven't met someone i think i click with yet. and i am very okay with that. i met someone while i was out on friday, and we have plans wednesday, but again, we shall see what emerges from this one. i am kind of in selfish mode right now. dating is great, but i am so focused on my health, and spending time with family/friends that i am not even sure i want a boyfriend right now. dating would be okay i think. but i am really all about continuing my weight loss journey (25 more lbs to go!!) and doing things for MYSELF! we shall see where life takes me... i turn 32 in a couple of weeks, and as much as i used to dread the thought of being a single gal at 32, i am embracing it now! i SHOULD embrace that! i mean too much too myself and others to settle. that is where i am at right now. i am hoping to do a better job of keeping up on this blog this time around :-)